God, Inc. and What Prayer Feels Like

What it feels like...

Guy is sitting inside of his car on a hot and sunny day, exhausted from all the pressures upon him.

Guy: (closes eyes in prayer) Oh God!

Speaker box: Sir, please ring the doorbell.

Guy opens his eyes, he has somehow been transported in front of a large building that looks like the White House. On the door, in gold letters it reads: God Inc. There is a speaker mounted above the door.

Guy: What?

The angry New Yorker behind him, taps him on the shoulder.

Angry New Yorker : Hey buddy, we're all waitin' to get inside! Keep the line movin'!

Speaker box: Sir, the doorbell!

Guy rings the doorbell.

Speaker box: Welcome to God Inc.: where God is God and you are not. Please step inside.

Guy steps inside and the door slams behind him.

Speaker box: This transaction will cost you two hours of your time.

Guy: Woah?! I don't have that kinda time.

A receptionist angel greets Guy from behind a large white desk.

Receptionist Angel: Hello. Welcome to God Inc.

Guy: Yes, um, I'm not sure how I got here but I just need to talk to God.

Receptionist Angel: (smiles) Doesn't everybody. Please take a number.

Guy: Number?

Receptionist Angel: Yes (points to her right) over there sir. Grab a number, follow the arrows and have a seat.

Guy: But I just need to talk to God.

Receptionist Angel: And God wants to talk to you because God loves you. Now take a number! (Yells) Next!

Guy reluctantly grabs a number from the ticket machine.

Guy: Four-billion fifty-five?

Guy looks around and notices the arrows on the floor.He follows them down two flight of stairs, through three hallways and up a flight of stairs. He then comes to a door that reads: Incoming Prayers.

Guy:God?

He opens the door to a huge waiting room the size of a football stadium. The front of it is lined with near a hundred receptionist desks.

Guy: This is ridiculous!

Guy walks over and stands in line behind someone nearly finished with their transaction. It is his turn.

Receptionist Angel: (to last person)Thank you, come again. (Looks at Guy)Yes sir, may I help you?

Guy: This number can't be right. This ticket says my number is...

Receptionist Angel: Four-billion fifty-five, the number is based upon your contribution to Kingdom of God.

Guy: Come again?

Receptionist Angel: (pulls out long computer print-out) Well, we do believe in mercy every now and then. Let's see if we can expedite your request. What is the nature of your concern?

Guy: I don't understand.

Receptionist Angel: God is a busy God and it is our job to make sure God's time is not wasted. Concern please?

Guy: Well I...

Receptionist Angel: Are you fighting a giant?

Guy: No.

Receptionist Angel: Fighting an army single-handed?

Guy: No.

Receptionist Angel: Fighting an angry mob of religious officials for the cause of Christ?

Guy: No.

Receptionist Angel: Tsk,tsk. (Marks his paper) That's a demerit. (Looks at Guy) What is the problem then?

Guy: I've just been really discouraged and depressed lately. Y'know, I need a good-paying job and I would like to be married one day and...

Receptionist Angel: (smiles) One thing at a time partner! God is in a meeting with Moses and Elijah right now, but maybe if we look at some of these other categories we may be able to find a quicker time slot for God to meet with you. OK then (picks up list again) let's see here, we'll start off low. The amount of people you brought to salvation in Jesus Christ last week?

Guy: I brought a friend to church last year, but last week...I guess...zero.

Receptionist Angel: (Marks paper) Demerit, this is not looking good. The amount people you prayed for yesterday?

Guy: I prayed for two people...I remember...I prayed for Kate and....

Receptionist Angel: Ooh sorry, we usually don't consider expediting requests for people with anything less than twenty. But, hey, here's an idea: why don't you just smile and wait, and perhaps God will do something for you next year, OK?

Guy: But my family is...

Receptionist Angel: Patience my friend. It'll all work out. Next!

What it is...

Guy: Oh God! I need you!

God: I am here and I am working on your behalf.

Roman 8:28-30:

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[i] have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

2 Peter 3:9

9The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish...

Keep the Faith.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

Exegesis of my Heart

 Psalm 42
1As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, O God.



Today, my younger sister sat in a hospital bed. There were no decorations in the small room in which the drab green curtain acted as a doorway, just white floor on white wall and a white sink in the corner. She had vomited for the last 12 hours—all she wanted was water, though she could not keep it down. She needed it so bad, the forthcoming IV served as a relief, for even though it pained her to be punctured through the arm by needle, that needle delivered life; water. She could not gulp it in mouthfuls but was willing to glean it from moistened paper towels; water—the bringer of life.
Without God, we dry up, we stop thinking, we stop functioning. He is the IV delivering life in the midst of our disease, and yet He never runs out.



2My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?



I long for Heaven so much, because I am convinced Earth has no idea what to do with me. I can not drink until I pass out, for God uses me sober, I can not use women to satisfy my biological needs, for God needs me to be holy—imperfect but striving. I do not fall for certain tricks but am learning to build barriers and boundaries around the things I do fall for. I just want to see God already. I want to stop feeling left out and self-conscious, I long for the perfect peace I last knew in a baby's ignorance, I long for Heaven and a Father that never disappoints me.



3My tears have been my food
day and night,
while men say to me all day long,
“Where is your God?”



Have you ever been so disturbed that you could not eat? There is such pain so connected to our inner parts, when aggravated it feels like a drill through the chest. There is such gloom that invades one's heart that the legs refuse to function, the arms fling soullessly with all attempts at motion and the eyes would rather be kept shut, damning the entire body to the darkness it feels.
Jesus Christ is not a theological concept to encourage morality, He is our brother in suffering, our advising friend in difficulty and our God that strengthens the legs of those He loves to walk confidently upon the stormy waters before us
.
4These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go with the multitude,
leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving
among the festive throng.



How beautiful it was to worship God when it was all easy. How great it was to learn about forgiveness when there were yet people who trampled my name into the pavement and made church uncomfortable. A 'crisis of faith' is a significant event in a believer's life, when the Word collides with your walk. The underlying question becomes, what place does God have in your life. It's all or nothing.



5Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and

Remember how your morning began with God's blessings, from style of clothing, to the ruffled sheets of your bed, to the way the creamy canned milk and coffee collaborated with poured sugar to deliver a pleasing taste to your mouth—you are surrounded by the palace of the Lord's favor built tile by tile from undeserved blessings. He has provided.

Feed the fire of your faith with the encouragement of your heart. Override your fluctuating emotions with the Truth of God in your life and from His Word. Remember the depths from which God saved you and how you have matured since then. You may not be where you want to be but thank God, you are not where you used to be.

6my God.
My^c soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you
from the land of the Jordan,
the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.



“my God.” As if David, were drowning in the ocean, fighting to scream out a single phrase in the hopes of rescue before falling to the depths of the sea driven by the burden of his own weight. The love of Christ, the presence of God is what buoys us above our tempestuous environments.
The soul cries out for what will keep it alive. Our souls will be restless until they find their rest in Him.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

A/theist Creed

As we age into the faith, I find that honest consideration of our beliefs, occurs less often than necessary. I present the following, for the purpose of starting a conversation. If you disagree, then why and on what is it based?

There I was, eating a sandwich at 11:20ish AM Leap Wednesday morning, when my eyes did exactly what happens as a lovely woman walks by. Captivated by the message "Know Thyself" up on a wall nearby, there appeared further wisdom scattered about it. The glass between I and it served as no barrier. Opening the double doors and submitting to my urge for consumption, I read:

A/theist Creed

I don't believe in a God who is safe, gentle and passive.

I don't believe in a God who calls His people to all things comfortable and easy.

I don't believe in a God who is not good in every way.

I don't believe in a God that in His entirety, His intentions, methods, feelings, will and works can be bound between leather.

I don't believe that God's Word, the Bible, is itself His answer to our questions.

I don't believe in a God contained with or limited by man's ability to reconcile His (God's) seemingly contradictory and paradoxical nature.

I don't believe in a God that I can understand.

I don't believe in a God who created a broken world only to leave it behind and watch it from on high, indifferent to its struggle and strife for life.

I don't believe in a God who compromises His justice to accommodate a man who has done "good" but not accepted God's means of salvation (Christ).

I don't believe in a God who desires anything less than our deepest well-being and joy.

I don't believe in a God who isn't awful, fearsome and even dangerous.

I don't believe in a God who is anything short of wild and crazy to love.

I don't believe in a God who isn't love, a God, with whom my relationship could be anything less than a love affair.

-Jon Geniesse

Prayer of An Anxious Heart on A Gray Morning

Lord God,

I thank you for the breath in my lungs and that you always hear me, but I need you now in a special way. I am still waiting for your purpose to be revealed in my my life, help me to see that my prayers are like a file in a cabinet and not a football pass. God you never miss the ball. Even though I feel like I've been alone for a while now, I'll hold onto to memories of those times when you were so close I could feel your hand on my shoulder.

Please show me where you are Lord. I'm doing what you ask me to do but I don't see anything. Every day in my Bible courses, there are students with the same prayer requests: cancer, death, foreclosure, suicide, abandonment and divorce—show up in a big way God. How about an angel? Could you send us an angel Lord? Nevertheless, build our faith Jesus, that we may see the evidence of your work in everything.

I pray for my family: many of them know you in their heads but don't live it out, because they treat me worse than balled up toilet paper. Open up opportunities so that I can speak life into their anger and depression. Make me an ambassador of Heaven.

Thank You Lord for these simple trials because they remind me that I'm an alien here. I'm a foreigner that'll never quite fit in, but that's OK. I will find peace in you and the knowledge that us foreigners number in the millions. We will wait on you Lord.

Please clothe me in your armor of light and strengthen me for this day.

Amen.

Thank God He's Not People

Do you ever tire of being under another person's critical judgment? It can be very discouraging to much of the growth you've made throughout life, to watch yourself be this stringent judge of your own mannerisms, dress and etc., as you're reminded by others of your supposed unworthiness.

Sunday came as it usually does, reminding me that the weekend was coming to a close (or was just beginning, depending on your critical preference) and I had one of those obligations to see to. Its the kind in which you must attend a family friend from many years ago's wedding in order to show the community of your past, at large, that the fact you never call any of them is no indication of the ill-will stored in your heart.

I exited the car in a suit rushed on my bodice at the last moments of decision. Looking as the Joker incarnate, pastel purple button-up to match, I entered the small church at the end of a field torn to dirt, an accurate description of what was soon to be my insides.

All eyes shot in my direction, bullets dead-on the target of my heart. If they had been dogs, I feel confident to say they would have snarled. This place was filled with years of my life gone by:people I played tag with, co-starred in plays with and started ministry ventures with—all angry, somehow my consistent breathing had disappointed them. My insecurities could have filled a journal, nevertheless I did all expected of me: “Hey, what's up,” smile, “I haven't seen you in forever,” smile, smile.

What could I have possibly done to deserve this behavior? To quote the wisdom of my three sisters at once: “Who cares?”

We will disappoint people regularly—one thing we can guarantee of ourselves in this life.

Let's just make sure that we as believers we don't make the mistake of seeing God in the same way. God has known us before we were thoughts floating in the back of someone's mind and yet He will never turn on us. He never needs us to crawl into a corner and hope for his forgiveness, He says we can boldly come before his throne.

“Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
-Hebrews 4:16



Thank God He's not people.



In Him,
Jean-Marc

Top Ten Reasons to Embrace Marriage before the Millennial Reign by H. Kinker

Every once in a while you get an article response worth posting. This is my friend Haley Kinker responding to my "Top Ten Reason to Stay a Bachelorette/Bachelor 'Til the Rapture" piece.

Top Ten Reasons to Embrace Marriage before the Millennial Reign

by Haley Kinker

10.) You get more done with more hands. 

It’s a common falsehood to think that marriage will cause you to lose all sense of productivity. If you marry someone with God’s blessing they will not be working against you, but with you. You could read through books together, and have someone to bounce opinions off of.

9.) Fulfilling God's design for Humanity.

I am of the opinion that soul mates do not exist. There are many of the “right kinds” of people that God has for you. Once you consummate your marriage, you become soul mates. Marriage is actually an act of worship when done in the way God designed it, because marriage is in fact, God designed.

8.) Know Yourself Better

It’d be naïve to say that marriage will fulfill all your fairytale dreams with a prince and princess running away into a world of happily ever afters. However, the right spouse will draw out your best attributes and vice versa. As my Aunt always says, “loving someone is about choosing to see what makes a person beautiful and focusing on that, instead of tearing them down with pointing out all their faults. Love makes people want to be better, and a godly spouse can help you find the unique purpose God created you for. 

 

7.) An accountability partner 

 

A spouse is not to be a nag, a parent, or a ruler, but rather a God-given blessing that can make you want to be holier and closer to the Lord because when you get home at night you are looking at more than just your own face in the mirror. When two people are in love, its like looking into a mirror with each one seeing the other's deepest desires and struggles. You may hide from the rest of the world, but God keeps you accountable through them.

6.) You’ll make the most valuable investment of your life.

Anything is going to look dreadful if you focus on what you are losing, but it becomes something to celebrate when you realize all that you will gain. You have the opportunity to invest in the life of someone else, to leave a legacy with your children that will far surpass the number of years in your life’s journey.

5.) New Dreams

When two fully-alive individuals unite in marriage, common interests and dreams are typically birthed in their hearts. Common interests are often something that attracts two people together. So now you have that best friend to ski with in Switzerland, to backpack across Ireland, to cook dinner with at night, and share your hopes and dreams with. You can still spend time with your individual friends, but marriage is a great chance to solidify a new friendship built through laughter and fun. 

 

4.) Motivation to Strive for the Best

Marriage is a new chapter, but not the last one! I will once again quote one of the wisest people I know, my aunt. She always says, “Just because you’re married does not mean you’re done dating.” Seeing your spouse’s face first thing in the morning and the last thing at night should grow in your heart an increased desire to stay in your best shape, and to continually pursue the other. Love is a mystery, in that two people who have been married for decades will still say that they still find out new things about their significant other every day. Genuine love really is a bottomless bowl, a delightful mystery that brings out our best.

3.) The opportunity to put feet to your faith.

Marriage is not going to be about you. It takes two mature individuals who care more about the other than themselves. John 12:24 says, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies; it bears much fruit.” Christ called us to die to ourselves, but too often we mistake that for a one-time event. Initially, it may be so. But dying to yourself is a daily process that allows Christ to be more glorified in your weakness. Marriage is a great way to be forced to die daily. Your life is no longer about you, and you will have to die to the individualistic “me first” mentality that plagues our culture. This will be of benefit not only to your marriage, but in ministry and life because marriage teaches service.

2.) A New Family!

Crazy in-laws are a common anxiety of newly-weds. What about the bride’s mother who shows up the day after the honey moon to help you “settle in?” Two families coming together is going to be difficult, but if it’s easy, it’s probably not maturing you in any way. If Christians began to see a new family as a new mission field I believe God would bless that. And who says everyone has crazy in-laws?

1.) “Be More Holy & Closer to God”

As Ephesians 5:31-32 says, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church…” Paul himself had the gift of singleness, but he realized not all did. Marriage is not designed to be a burden, but a holy covenant meant to glorify the Lord in the unity of his creation just as he intended it to be. Marriage is a gift to be graciously accepted.

-Haley Kinker  writes for the blog "The Winepress"
She is also a Ministry and English Major attending Southeastern University in Lakeland, FL

The Virgin Confessions

The Virgin Confessions (Matthew 25:1-13)

by Jean-Marc Saint Laurent

Virgin 6: Sister (taps Virgin 1) Sister!

Virgin 1: Yes?

Virgin 6: Why are you humming?

Virgin 1: Why, I am humming the wedding song.

Virgin 6: But why are you doing it? And please don''t say it.

Virgin 1: Dear sister, the Bridegroom is...

Virgin 6: (imitates sister's high-pitch) The Bridegroom, the Bridegroom!You sound like mother.

Virgin 1: Please, just wait and trust that He will come for us.

Virgin 6: Trust in who?! A man I have never seen?!

Virgin 2: (lazily) We are trying to sleep.

Virgin 6: (to Virgin 2) Then go home! You ladies must really have nothing better to do, if you are willing to sit out here, waiting in the dark for some Prince to show up!

Virgin 2: (mumbles) Grouchy (attempts to fall back asleep)

Virgin 1: Sister, do not let your faith be shaken. We have seen the completion of the lovely palanquin that will carry us into the banquet.

Virgin 6: Big deal.

Virgin 1: We have seen the whole town preparing for the seven days of feasting.

Virgin 6: So what?

Virgin 1:And to top it all off, the Bridegroom Himself has chosen us ten to enjoy in His riches for the rest of our lives.

Virgin 6: Yeah? Well I could use some of those benefits right about now, but he ain't here! You can go ahead and look dumb and foolish. But the rest of us know better...me and four other girls didn't even bring oil for our lamps; we're just here out of obligation. Don't you expect us to actually care about someone that has likely forgotten us!

Virgin 1: I understand your reasoning, but you never looked deep into His eyes. If you saw them, then you would know that only truth could reside there. He is coming back— a few of us still choose to believe His Word.

Virgin 6: Whatever, I'm at least going to get some sleep (closes her eyes).

Hours Later...

Townspeople: HERE'S THE BRIDEGROOM! COME OUT TO MEET HIM!

Virgin 1: The Bridegroom is here my friends! Quickly, trim your lamps with oil! (Lights lamp and runs toward bridal carriage)

Virgin 6: (waking up) Wa...wait. Wait. Wait! Someone grab a lit lamp!(Looks around) They're getting away! The Bridegroom! Does anyone have oil?!

Virgin 4: (Lighting lamp) Sorry, not enough oil to share.(Charges toward bridal carriage) I'm here! I'm ready for the feast!

Virgin 8: No oil! (crying) We are ruined! Didn't I say this would happen?!

Virgin 7: The Bridegroom!

Virgin 10: He's leaving us!

Virgin 9: We must all learn to work the land now! (lifts hands) Imagine, these delicate hands...working!(crying)

Virgin 6: (Watches the bridal party leave) (speaks to herself)Why did I stop believing?

-May we continue to trust Jesus and wait in expectancy of His Word coming true in our lives.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

Top Ten Reasons to Stay a Bachlorette/Bachelor 'til the Rapture

10.Get more Done.

Let's be honest, the time spent calling and solving issues with your “pooky” was an extra 4 hours that could have been spent reading one of the books on your Must Read list or becoming fluent in Spanish or reading your Bible or...

9.You'll never be Unequally Yoked.

Worrying about someone else's soul can be the cause of many ulcers and sleepless nights. Enjoy peace and rest. Have your angel cake and eat it to.

8. No Uncomfortable Relationship Questions.

Once you start a romantic relationship, its discovery by friends and family is imminent, once that happens you lose all individual person-hood. Every other question is: “How is [your significant other] doing?” Try hesitating with this answer for 5 seconds and the deeper questions become out about the health of your relationship. And we all know you're not going to tell them to mind their own business, so you will just have to resign yourself to feeling awkward for just being you.

7. No one Tracking Your Every Move

Feel that metal thing strapped around your ankle? Time to check in: every hour on the hour and learn to start feeling guilty for diverting from the set schedule to get an ice cream cone 2 minutes from your place. “No one's gonna track me,” you say, checking your fancy touch screen to read “5 Missed Calls, 2 New Voice Messages and 20 New Text Messages.” First Message: “Just saw you pass by, I happen to be in the neighborhood.” You have been warned.

6. Save Money

Other than drain your energy, self identity and “you-time” (as if that wasn't enough), relationships will cost you more money the longer you stay in them. Everything doubles for a couple: a $10 visit to the cinema becomes a $20 movie date (not including the dinner which follows), a lovely individual meal for $20 becomes a $40 meal for two, a $40 shopping trip becomes an $80 disappointment...and so it goes until you end up relocating under the nearest bridge—and even then you have to share your box.

5. Keep your Friends

Even in the event that the one for which your soul repines does not have a controlling or jealous bone in their body, you will inevitably deal with the issue of how little time you spend together. The civilized world we find ourselves in requires hard work and long hours at the job, school or booth. Of the small sliver of time the slave masters of this age give you, you regularly have to choose between your buds and your Beloved as to who matters more. Seeing that you will not likely be waking up to your buds everyday for the rest of your life...the answer is made for you.

4. Stay Competitive and Keep the weight Off

Researchers and scientists have been boggled by the stats behind obesity for years, while everyone on the street has forever known the reasons behind it. Simply put: we look our best to snag a mate, but once snagged, complacency sets in and folks that spent 50 hrs + in the gym, find themselves content to lift the television remote and belly press a box Rocher Chocolates.

3. Constant Emotional Peace

When you bring a relationship into your life, you are essentially bringing in a person to interfere with the well-structured peace of it and either has as much or more problems than you do. The benefit of your problems is that you have had your entire life to deal with and understand them. For all you know, you will now be multiplying that times 2 to start understanding this person that is essentially a stranger to you.

2. No Creepy/Mean/Spiteful/Crazy In-laws to ask you hard financial questions and make Hell look like a decent option.

'Nuff Said

1. Be More Holy & Closer to God

Both Jesus: the Christ and Son of God and the Apostle Paul suggested that those that have the fortitude to be single should be (Matthew 19:11 and 1 Corinthians 7:1). You cannot argue with that.

And there you have it! Enjoy this beautiful thing call single life, or as I like to call it, the favor of the Most High.

Today: Worth Your Consideration

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own”

-Matthew 6:34

Today is worth your time and your focus beloved, do not jump over it or you just may fall in the pit of despair. The issue with worrying about the next day and day after that is that there is nothing you can do about it yet. Focus on your responsibilities today and repeat until your todays become your tomorrows and next weeks.

God has you on His mind all the time. He will not let you fall. You are well taken care of. Take in the air of this day and make it matter for God's glory.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

A Poem to Forget Tomorrow

How unfair to be a man on this earth;

To attempt to dam the flow of a woman's tears to no success;

how unfair.

How horrible it is to need a blow to the face to feel alive;

To be a grown man searching for the hands of an invisible father,

how unfair.

It is no fun to forget how to make tears when you need them;

To appear stoic when you have been raised with amnesia,

how unfair.

It is tiring to repeatedly play the bull in the china shop;

To strangle your strength for fear of scaring others,

how unfair.

The worst thing to say to a young boy: “life is not fair”;

To masquerade childish anger as adult wisdom,

how unfair.

Perhaps the world would be more fair if the children raised the parents;

Perhaps that is why some procreate;

To enact revenge on all that is unfair.

How unfair.

Be Your Calling

 "whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas or the world or life or death or the present or the future—all are yours, and you are of Christ, and Christ is of God."
-1 Corinthians 3:22-33

“Waiting for the unexpected seems contradictory but today I find it something worth practicing. Perhaps today is the day when everything changes, or perhaps it is the day when I am reminded of how predictable things are”

-ME, January 20, 2012

I will save you the trouble of deciphering poetry and respond, yes, it was about a young woman.

Life has a way of weakening our expectations: Things go so far and no farther. But once in a while we get a chance to surprise ourselves with the chances we take. How exciting it is to try and fail epically at the risks of life. It sounds cliché, but you are alive today for a reason, so live. If you have read anything I have written, you should be able to predict this line: You live to glorify God. When you glorify God, you make His awesomeness clear to those around you. Considering that, I find few greater ways to glorify our Creator than to live lives that show how great of a gift this life is.

Church is a great time to connect with the body of Christ and to refocus for the week ahead, but you were not saved or are not being saved to sit in a church service at 9:30 AM the picture is bigger than that.

So often, folks miscategorize the Christian life as not doing things. Many times (and I share the blame in this), we are simply marked as people that do not smoke, do not drink, do not watch porn, do not curse and do not like dirty jokes. Now do not get me wrong when I say that godly discipline is a heavenly gift, but let us not mark ourselves by that in which we do not partake, and start glorifying God through the great things God does through us. We are lovers, comforters, comedians, fighters, friends and adventurers. We comfort the discouraged and downtrodden, protect the disenfranchised and invite the lost to drink from the fountain life.

We are the body of Christ.

The temple of the Holy Spirit.

People of the Book.

Saints by grace, living by faith.

We are Christians.

We are the children of God.

We are the people of God.

And I would not choose to live any other way.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

Am I the Only One?

God of the Open Sky,

Will you smile on me?

I am a rotten child,

in spiritual poverty.

God of the Open Sky,

How I long to know,

the feeling of total love,

Without work of my own.

When I do stumble,

When I want to fall,

When I find it hard sometimes to pray at all,

God of the Open Sky,

hear my plea ,

and save me from everything,

inside of me.

I attend a birthday gathering, some normal folk are there; unbelievers. Is that how all people must be defined? The party is a surprise at the gym. I am driving after sunset, down the streets of this town. The light from the street lamps bounce in succession off the car's paint. I think he is a Christian—and by his demeanor, you could tell. My Spirit doth testify. Sharp face, innocent attitude, fat: nonexistent. He said he was graduating from a Christian school.

Before the drive, before the turn of the key—I see them, man and woman, kissing in the darkness. They stroll and pass the car before I back up. The woman seems more contented at the time of the kiss then after. “How lovely,” I think, still delirious from my workout. The air, the unbelievers, the innocence, it hit me: “Are Christians people that believe the world can get better?” A deep question for the dark drive home but I probe again, “Are they?”

I suddenly remember how uncomfortable it had been to be surrounded by individuals of unknown affiliations. “What is wrong with me?”

I remember learning to be a warrior, long before the workout with torn black tees that stick to my chest from sweat. There were always near ten of us. Men gathered in an upper room somewhere in the night of New York City. Men I always felt less holy than. They preached on trains and to strangers. I did some but not to their humble fame. I watched video after video, learning to feel bad about who I was. Videos of men snapping their fingers: “People are dying without Jesus,” men warning against the dangers of media mind control: “watch for the third eye,” men speaking on the power of succubi: “they are most powerful at night, look in the mirror.” People needed to be saved in this city; why wasn't I saving them? “What is wrong with me?”

I am in the car: are Christians just waiting for the world to end? I ignore this question and go back to the first one, to the kissing. “Would it still have been beautiful if they were cheating on their spouses?” I inquire of the air. Thank God no one answers. I start again from another angle: “Are Christians people that believe that the world can get better?” “Well,” I begin, “in order for the world to get better, one must admit that it is currently in an undesirable state” Point:Jesus. The rest, from here seems to fall into an apologetic sandwich (yes, I am hungry). “If the world is not in a good state on its own, then it can not do it by itsself: people can not be good on their own; just look around.” I continue, “In order for their to be change, a third party must be introduced, one that surpasses the limitations of the human condition.” Now for the wrap-up: “enter the Holy Spirit, which changes us from the inside- out, made possible by the sacrifice of Jesus Christ.”

Christians are people that not only hope for a better world, they attempt through the power of God to change its people for the better of us all.

Point: Jesus.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

The Christian Hypocrite's Meeting Has Been Cancelled

To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free”

-John 8: 31-32

alétheia: truth

Original Word: ἀλήθεια, ας, ἡ
Part of Speech: Noun, Feminine
Transliteration: alétheia
Phonetic Spelling: (al-ay'-thi-a)
Short Definition: truth
Definition: truth, but not merely truth as spoken; truth of idea, reality, sincerity, truth in the moral sphere, divine truth revealed to man, straightforwardness.

• Strong's concordance from biblos.com

So there I was about to speak the other Sunday, two before I turned 26 (on January 23^rd). One of the young ladies from the youth group introduced me as “Pastor Jean-Marc,” and I was on. I have to tell you that I could imagine at least 50 other places I would have liked to be. I had been here a number of times before for my monthly appearance to a group of folks I felt could have cared less about what I wanted to share. “This week, we're going to talk about something that is controversial in the church...a usually controversial topic, and its about fun...the topic is fun.” I was dead in the water, I just had to struggle a little bit to affirm that I was actually dead. “Where's my preparation?” I thought, “all those cool and hip references I had planned to use?” They would not come, they just sat there in the recess of my mind, as I was left with was myself: the annoyed university student that had not felt connected to anything for weeks—people, humanity, God, family, my dreams.

I made it out,bodily alive and determined to forget the tragedy I had just endured—at least I tried. “I don't know what happened to you Jean-Marc,” responded a relative,“You did something different.” And then I remembered what I had immediately decided before speaking: I was going to talk with them honestly. Honesty I did show, just not the kind I wanted. I just forgot what my Bible said, y'know, through that dude Jesus:

“For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks”

-Matthew 12:34

Considering all that and the words and stuff above, I can not fake it...and call myself a maturing Christ follower.

My father is seventy plus years old, and today he told me the most profound thing I ever heard him say when I talked about the topic of truthfulness in the community of faith, “I condemn myself before I condemn other people.” This guy is a veteran pastor, that regularly starts conversations with: “The reason God is not working in your life is because you lack faith” Hypocrisy is not new to my family experience (Oops I should not have said that).

What? It is like many of us get saved by grace to become self-sufficient. Please tell me how this makes sense. And that is where the disconnect comes for many of us in our Christian experience, we hardly admit to God (let alone other people) that we are having a hard time connecting and trusting Him and His invisible deity self.

The book I am currently reading, “TruthFaced” by Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol and John Lynch, talks about, Pleasing God Vs. Trusting God. They give a great picture of the experience many of us face in our goal to please through our own great efforts:

“Welcome to the Room of Good Intentions.”

Oh yes. I like the ring of this name. I also like being perceived as someone who is well intended. “Well thanks,” I answer. “I think I've found my home. How are you​?”

The hostess pauses for a moment and then reaches into her purse to pull out a mask bearing a guarded expression and a thin smile. She puts it on and answers, “Fine. Just fine. And you?”

The entire room gets suddenly quiet, awaiting my answer. “Well, umm, thanks for asking. I'm kind of struggling with some things right now, some areas don't seem to be in keeping with who I know I'm supposed to be. I'm not really sure I'm doing well on a lot of—” The hostess cuts me off, putting her finger to her lips and handing me a similar mask. I'm not quite sure what to do. I don't really want to put it on, but others in the room are smiling and motioning for me to do so. I want so much to be accepted here that I slowly put it on.

And now everything feels different. I am quickly overcome with the realization that less self- revelation would be a smart game plan here. I realize that no one in this room wants to hear about my struggles, pain, or doubt. If I want to be welcome here, I'd better keep my cards closer to my vest and give the appearance of sufficiency. So, I slowly and carefully say the words, “Actually, I'm fine. I'm doing just fine. Thanks.” Satisfied, everyone in the room turns back to their conversations.(pp. 38-39)

How do you feel? Are you as tired as I was: a hamster running on the wheel of attempting the appearance of perfection. Please get off, you're not fooling anyone and most importantly you're not fooling God.

I dare you to insert honesty in your relationship with God and people. Some folks can not stand to have real conversations that do not end with high-fives and fist bumps. I was there once, in a church situation where everyone was “fine”—so I got new friends.

God loves the real you, not the one you pretend to be.

And if you're willing to be real with me, I could always use some honest Christians to talk to.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

A Smile You Can Trust

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God..."
-John 14:1


Sometimes we allow our habits to get the better of us. We learn to trigger certain behaviors after A or B happens. And it can all seem so hopeless, can't it?


How many times can one person really believe that  no one cares for them? 


 They walk about with this plastered smile as if they were fooling someone.


We (starting with  me) need to un-learn some of our norms. Some of us are so volcanic and so scared to offend a soul, that we just erupt on the inside. At that point, the one that end up hurting us is us. And somehow others are responsible for how we feel?


The fact is that if God occupied more thought space in our mind, if we trusted Him more, we would have less time to consider everything  that others think. And the sad truth about it is that other probably think about us 50x less than we think they do.


Trust in God, not people (they will let you down and can be unpredictable). Trust in God.


In Him,

Jean-Marc

A Wake Up Call for Joy in the Morning

Then Jesus cried out, "When a man believes in me, he does not believe in me only, but in the one who sent me. When he looks at me, he sees the one who sent me. I have come into the world as a light, so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness
-John 12:44-46


I live in a world just like yours, except mine is a little different, my point of view is effected by things that you may or may not have experienced. I have a past but thank God that in Him I can have a future.


Some folks don't see it that way and I can understand. Part of my penance for the time being is to spend a great deal of it with a depressive. Days are spent watching them shuffle about from here to there, as if their feet just decided to do their walking for them. They sit alone sometimes, they drink tea sometimes and talk very little. I try to talk about the hope of God with them, and its like "Yeah, O.K."  I wish I could shake them and let them feel this thing burning in my heart for a greater tomorrow and future

— a real desire for God (am I perfect? Dude, if you knew me, you would not have to ask). But my activity is limited to their external: I can just speak at them, though God can reach into them, adjust that soul button.

So, for those of you carousing(I was going to write parousing, though it is not a word, apparently; very angry about that) through life in a sort of lackadaisical funk, I have been there and I say this with all the love I can muster: WAKE UP!

You are loved beyond comprehension! Do you know how much God loves you? He walked over to a cross, understanding the pain of asphyxiation and the complete humility it would take to become a spitting target for creatures millions of grades below Him on the food chain and said, "Yes, please!" "Yes please?" Yes "Yes, please!"  

So next time you deal with that person in your life that cannot see any good inside of their understandingly horrible circumstances, its O.K., pray for them.

And the next time you feel like that discarded and disrespected person that not even the most vile Cretan would associate with (even if your on Facebook with 1056 friends), don't believe the lie. 

Know that you are loved. Remember/Rediscover the cross. 

P.S.--PRAYER STILL GETS ANSWERED:HOLD ON!

In Him,

Jean-Marc

The Open Door of Hope

“I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. The hired hand is not the shepherd who owns the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming , he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it. The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep. I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me...and I lay down my life for the sheep.”

-John 10:11-15

What is a more beautiful thing in the world than hope? And what is a more disastrous thing in your world than fear? What does it take to make good men and women cry?

I once sat waiting outside of my middle school for a ride in my family's car. Usually, my would mother show up, but that day, I am thankful that my brother was there for this one specific moment in history. A kid much taller than I, pushed me aside “accidentally” and that is exactly what my brother saw. He was just poetic in his threat to this behemoth of mine, which to him was an ant. The boy shook and from then on, chose to walk on the other side of the sidewalk when I needed to wait for my ride.

Whatever you are running from today, that has you feeling as though it will crush you, is nothing but smoke and mirrors. I can tell you because I have walked through my own house of mirrors for years. Mirrors cannot hurt you they just look that way. I knew another kid, (in middle school again)— who got so scared that he ran into a fun house mirror—I would not recommend it.

Years later, more learned in the deceit of trickery, I found myself staring down an imposter in the face. He thought that a young woman that needed a job would be an easy target—not when she's my sister! I would rather die.

We are the sheep, shepherded by God Himself. Whom shall we fear? What can human beings or Satan do to us (Psalm 118:6)? God laid down His life, not so we would have some new songs to sing in church, but so we would have some new songs to sing on the street, on the stage and in the dark.

Fear does not exist in God's pen. Stay in God's pasture.

In Him,


Jean-Marc

Living And Dying At Once

“Christians are people who are always living and always dying”

-Dr. Robert Crosby

As he [Jesus] went along he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?"

“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.”

-John 9:1-3

Imagine, your issues could be used to display the work of God. I don't always believe it all the time. Life is hard most of the time these days and I want the escape hatch I used to have: "Oh, it's just this town" or "The people here stink," but age teaches you that these things are not true. Blame everyone you want, blame your parents if you have the time but ultimately it falls short. Perhaps the point is to get us into the place of  tears being our food day and night (Psalm 42:3) or to the place where we cry, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!" (Luke 18:38)

I have been crying for mercy for weeks, but I do not feel large God arms coming to hug me. I have needed comfort for weeks and perhaps...I should stop counting the time. Maybe God has to remove things for my life by killing some of them. Maybe some dreams of mine were inappropriate or unrealistically childish and that's what is happening—fantasies dying until the reality of God remains.

I wish I had all the answers—I don't. I wish I had the right words to say—I won't. But I know God never cared about that. He knew I was incorrect in my thinking, and He has done me the favor of allowing me to discover it by such public means. "Thank you Jesus," I say in the midst of the darkness. Even if my cousin has a demon inside of her, you are the light of the world. You will guide me home.

In Him,

Jean-Marc

I Refuse to Be Caged

Race is the prison of society. I write this with full knowledge of what I write. Race is the boundary which we (meaning the human race), have set up to protect ourselves from division—the reverse Babel, but this imaginary enclosure only serves to make us pine for the freedom from which we restrict ourselves. Perhaps you do not think of yourself as a prisoner, and maybe there was a day when you actually enjoyed God's creation.

I remember freedom, potentials seemed infinite. We played in the sunlight of our glorious youthful naivety. I planted a kiss on Sarah's cheek when she least expected it. Ignorance was bliss, but our ignorance would not be tolerated. We were to learn what everyone else knew—believe in the fables they spread about our differences, under the guise of historical review and accuracy. We gave up our right to play, learning to tolerate one another under the supervision of the politically correct status quo.

I would not likely kiss Sarah now, I have learned lots since then. The heavy hands of history and society push us aside. Adults do not have the option of un-learning, though we can learn to forgive. We can home school ourselves into a new way of thinking. We can sing “Jesus loves the little children” and mean it. If you still have the energy for freeze-tag then I challenge you to stand up and run. Learn to remember our yesterday until it becomes our future. We may leave the cells for which we hold the key. We can still choose to be free.

In Him,

Jean-Marc