Every once in a while you get an article response worth posting. This is my friend Haley Kinker responding to my "Top Ten Reason to Stay a Bachelorette/Bachelor 'Til the Rapture" piece.
Top Ten Reasons to Embrace Marriage before the Millennial Reign
by Haley Kinker
10.) You get more done with more hands.
It’s a common falsehood to think that marriage will cause you to lose all sense of productivity. If you marry someone with God’s blessing they will not be working against you, but with you. You could read through books together, and have someone to bounce opinions off of.
9.) Fulfilling God's design for Humanity.
I am of the opinion that soul mates do not exist. There are many of the “right kinds” of people that God has for you. Once you consummate your marriage, you become soul mates. Marriage is actually an act of worship when done in the way God designed it, because marriage is in fact, God designed.
8.) Know Yourself Better
It’d be naïve to say that marriage will fulfill all your fairytale dreams with a prince and princess running away into a world of happily ever afters. However, the right spouse will draw out your best attributes and vice versa. As my Aunt always says, “loving someone is about choosing to see what makes a person beautiful and focusing on that, instead of tearing them down with pointing out all their faults. Love makes people want to be better, and a godly spouse can help you find the unique purpose God created you for.
7.) An accountability partner
A spouse is not to be a nag, a parent, or a ruler, but rather a God-given blessing that can make you want to be holier and closer to the Lord because when you get home at night you are looking at more than just your own face in the mirror. When two people are in love, its like looking into a mirror with each one seeing the other's deepest desires and struggles. You may hide from the rest of the world, but God keeps you accountable through them.
6.) You’ll make the most valuable investment of your life.
Anything is going to look dreadful if you focus on what you are losing, but it becomes something to celebrate when you realize all that you will gain. You have the opportunity to invest in the life of someone else, to leave a legacy with your children that will far surpass the number of years in your life’s journey.
5.) New Dreams
When two fully-alive individuals unite in marriage, common interests and dreams are typically birthed in their hearts. Common interests are often something that attracts two people together. So now you have that best friend to ski with in Switzerland, to backpack across Ireland, to cook dinner with at night, and share your hopes and dreams with. You can still spend time with your individual friends, but marriage is a great chance to solidify a new friendship built through laughter and fun.
4.) Motivation to Strive for the Best
Marriage is a new chapter, but not the last one! I will once again quote one of the wisest people I know, my aunt. She always says, “Just because you’re married does not mean you’re done dating.” Seeing your spouse’s face first thing in the morning and the last thing at night should grow in your heart an increased desire to stay in your best shape, and to continually pursue the other. Love is a mystery, in that two people who have been married for decades will still say that they still find out new things about their significant other every day. Genuine love really is a bottomless bowl, a delightful mystery that brings out our best.
3.) The opportunity to put feet to your faith.
Marriage is not going to be about you. It takes two mature individuals who care more about the other than themselves. John 12:24 says, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies; it bears much fruit.” Christ called us to die to ourselves, but too often we mistake that for a one-time event. Initially, it may be so. But dying to yourself is a daily process that allows Christ to be more glorified in your weakness. Marriage is a great way to be forced to die daily. Your life is no longer about you, and you will have to die to the individualistic “me first” mentality that plagues our culture. This will be of benefit not only to your marriage, but in ministry and life because marriage teaches service.
2.) A New Family!
Crazy in-laws are a common anxiety of newly-weds. What about the bride’s mother who shows up the day after the honey moon to help you “settle in?” Two families coming together is going to be difficult, but if it’s easy, it’s probably not maturing you in any way. If Christians began to see a new family as a new mission field I believe God would bless that. And who says everyone has crazy in-laws?
1.) “Be More Holy & Closer to God”
As Ephesians 5:31-32 says, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church…” Paul himself had the gift of singleness, but he realized not all did. Marriage is not designed to be a burden, but a holy covenant meant to glorify the Lord in the unity of his creation just as he intended it to be. Marriage is a gift to be graciously accepted.
She is also a Ministry and English Major attending Southeastern University in Lakeland, FL
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