I went for my usually run near home, when I came upon a group of teenagers waiting for the bus, I was feeling God's joy that morning and gave out a couple of tracts, even one to a stiff-looking speed walker.
But on my way back home, as I began running past an elderly couple, sitting at a bus stop, I became suddenly aware of what I was supposed to do:
“If you're going to witness, then what about that guy?” I thought looking at the white-haired man in conversation with a lady wheelchair-bound.
“Well, I don't have any tracts left”
“Isn't that a good excuse, do you need tracts to talk about Jesus?” I retorted.
“Well, no...”
“Then what are you waiting for? Just interrupt their conversation”
“But I don't know if that's a good idea”
“What, do you care about what people think about you? Do you want this man to go to hell?”
He had a point. So I stopped running and stood there dumbfounded, unsure of what to do, just a few feet away from the bus stop.
“I don't want him to go to hell”
“Good, then do something about it”
“But it doesn't make sense...I'm gonna keep running”
“You're leaving him?! You're just gonna leave?! Are you ashamed?! Are you scared?! You're gonna regret this! You're gonna regret this!”
“Maybe you're right”
“Of course I'm right, you're blowing it!”
My jog took me past another bench. A portly gentleman with black balding hair perched above his gold glasses kindly waves as I pass him by.
“Please don't be mad, I know I should have stopped”
“I'm sick and tired of hearing about everything you should do. Just do something already!”
“You're right”
“I know I'm right”
“I don't know why God puts up with me”
“Beats me, I thought you were called, but let me...”
And then I heard through my headphones, a word sent from my Savior to me:
“God has two enemies: sin and religion”
-Mark Driscoll
I stopped the internal dialogue and realized my arrogance. If it was my job to save this entire world by myself, then where is God? Did I really think placing God on the sidelines was a holy thing to do? God does ministry, He just provides people the opportunity to take part in it.
I repented of my religion, sort of running, creeping and crying at the same time.
Religion is why you are unable to look at yourself in the mirror and sing, “It is well with my soul.”
Religion is why you are unable to stand certain people when you look at them, because somehow, someway, you got it into your mind that you were better than they were.
Religion is why you would sooner yell at people for their sin, then explain to them their need for a savior.
God has shoulders large enough to carry the world, your problems and some.
God is not looking for substitutes for when He is not feeling well.
God does not want to crush you, He wants to heal you.
The sad truth is many people have come in and out of church, but they've never met Jesus. They've tried to live “good lives” and try to be “good people.” But its a hamster wheel my friends: you just run in circles for really a long time, because you will never, ever, even in your wildest dreams be good enough to justify yourself to God. But the Good News is, you do not have to! You just need to meet Jesus.
No matter who you are, talk to Him and ask for His forgiveness. He will give it!
And when that's done, grab a Bible, open to the book of Mark and read.
“It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners”
-Mark 2:17
-In Him,
This article has touched me I go through one of the hardest points in my walk thus far. I have been trying to surrender MY way and that has proven to be one of my biggest struggles because I have yet to do it COMPLETELY. I like things to be MY way and I can be very stubborn even when I hear God asking me to just submit to His will. This proves to be the same reason why it takes so long to get the results I want or better because I always want to try it my way before I finally submit to His way… Anyone who does the same thing knows what I’m talking about; we keep doing what we want until we can’t take the RESULT of it any longer. I'm honored to serve Him because He is ever so patient with me ALWAYS!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your honesty sis. Following our invisible God, gets understandingly difficult at times, but when it gets rough and we mess up, there is Amazing Grace to sustain us.
ReplyDeleteWe not just God's servants, we are His friends.
"...because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. "
-John 15:15